Sunday, April 02, 2006

Your personal history of terror/shock/fear




We encounter everyday life from the moment we rise from our bed, splash water on our face, and walk out into the world. Every day typically follows a normal pattern that we are used to. We call this our "routine", and when we deviate from our "routine" we typically experience a bit of unfamiliarity or stress.Every once in a great while something out of the ordinary knocks on our door. Something absolutely horrid visits us. It is something that we never thought we would experience.What is the most terrible thing that you have ever seen with your own eyes?What is the most shocking thing that you have experienced in your life?What event in your life have you gone through that brings a bitter memory?My most terrible memory used to haunt me in my dreams for a solid year. It was the day I watched my daughter, Maddy, drown right before my eyes. Maddy was 3 years old, and my son was 1 year old. I was in a swimming pool with my son enjoying the water, when I saw my daughter drop in. I tried to get to her as fast as I could...but it seemed like I was stuck in a time warp of slow motion. I still remember seeing her face through the clear water...sucking water into her lungs...her eyes were wide open with fear...she was trying to swim to the top but unable. Yes, I rescued her within 1 minute. But the thought of "what if" (what if I wasn't RIGHT there?) haunted me for a while.So now I have shared. Now it's your turn. Open up and tell me the one thing that you have seen that you wish you could erase from your mind...

We encounter everyday life from the moment we rise from our bed, splash water on our face, and walk out into the world. Every day typically follows a normal pattern that we are used to. We call this our "routine", and when we deviate from our "routine" we typically experience a bit of unfamiliarity or stress.Every once in a great while something out of the ordinary knocks on our door. Something absolutely horrid visits us. It is something that we never thought we would experience.What is the most terrible thing that you have ever seen with your own eyes?What is the most shocking thing that you have experienced in your life?What event in your life have you gone through that brings a bitter memory?My most terrible memory used to haunt me in my dreams for a solid year. It was the day I watched my daughter, Maddy, drown right before my eyes. Maddy was 3 years old, and my son was 1 year old. I was in a swimming pool with my son enjoying the water, when I saw my daughter drop in. I tried to get to her as fast as I could...but it seemed like I was stuck in a time warp of slow motion. I still remember seeing her face through the clear water...sucking water into her lungs...her eyes were wide open with fear...she was trying to swim to the top but unable. Yes, I rescued her within 1 minute. But the thought of "what if" (what if I wasn't RIGHT there?) haunted me for a while.So now I have shared. Now it's your turn. Open up and tell me the one thing that you have seen that you wish you could erase from your mind...

3 Comments:

At 9:54 AM, Blogger The Intolerant One said...

As a father of three I felt like I was living your fear (Picturing my own kid's). What a devestating moment that must have been. I am so happy to hear it turned out for the best. Your questions:

"What is the most terrible thing that you have ever seen with your own eyes?"

While changing the diaper on my youngest son, my older son (middle child and only 3 at the time) had jumped from the couch to the ground. On the way down he somehow tangled the "draw" string from the venetion blinds around his neck and hung himself. His little feet could not touch the ground and so it was strangling him. A "feeling" of impending doom (I will credit God with the warning)came over me. I turned and saw him, then ran over, lifting him up immediatley so he could breathe. He had little bright red marks around his neck and I felt like the negectful parent blaming myself for not having eye's in the back of my head. Praise God my little boy is 9 years old today.

"What is the most shocking thing that you have experienced in your life?"

Seeing the "plume" cloud coming up over the tree's (I was travelling on the Trans Canada 1 in Ontario which is a winding up and down highway and I was at the top of a hill) knowing, without fully seeing it, that there had just been a head on collision. As I arrived at the scene, although I did not know the people involved, I had just seen them at the gas station 30 minutes before that. Their pick up had hit a semi truck almost straight on. The man was pinned in his truck and his leg was dangling out. I stood at the side of the road and did what I know best. I prayed for the man as they loaded him into the stretcher (paramedics were on the scene almost instantly). Amazingly the story has a good ending. The two women with him survived as well as himself, minus one leg.

"What event in your life have you gone through that brings a bitter memory?"

Can't say that I dream about it and maybe that is because I have chosen to remove the bitterness by forgiveness towards the individual. That would be my biological father. He was a raging alcoholic who felt his manhood was displayed in beating the tar out of my mother. I used to hate him for the time he broke her arm. Thankfully she walked when I was still at a young age. As I grew older I ended up becoming the man I had despised, minus the physical abuse(I felt only wimps hit their women), and back then (in my early 20's) wanted to go find him (he lived on the west coast)and lay a heavy beating into him for what he did to my mother. It never happened. Ironically, while leaving the bar one day he was hit and killed by a drunk driver. Talk about "if you live by the sword you shall die by the sword." In time though God showed me a life with bitter root's would only hold me back. I learned to forgive my father even though he never asked for it.

" Open up and tell me the one thing that you have seen that you wish you could erase from your mind..."

The last 13 years of tyrannical Liberal rule in Canada:) (You know I had to throw a little chuckle in there)

Will you be coming over to my site to enter your say so on my "fun" entry? It will not be posted long before I begin my response to those who took part. Your participation would be very welcome. It's my latest entry titled "What about you?"

Can Alanita come out to play? :(

 
At 3:53 PM, Blogger Alanita said...

wow...the first story really sent chills down my spine. I could almost visualize your son going through that...and I totally understand the feeling of "being a neglectful parent". Thank God you were there at that moment. Thank God that I was there the moment Maddy fell into the swimming pool. The Lord is our protector. And THAT is just one of the many reasons that I will always love Him!

 
At 8:25 PM, Blogger Doctor Marco said...

I was once captured by armed fighters in horses in the mountains of my country, when I was bakcpacking with a friend. I had the thought of my body being eaten by condors.

 

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